Monday, August 21, 2006

*The DON'TS of Social Etiquette pt.1

For this topic, we’re gonna forego the DO’S, and get straight to the DON'TS of Social Etiquette for urban people. As soft, delicate and docile as women are, there often seems to be a few in our world that fuel the neck-rolling “no you didn’ts” that cause so many unsuspecting suburbanites to get that oh-so-famous “beat-down”. Instead of letting you walk into a bed of quicksand, I’m gonna share my wealth of knowledge on this subject with you. There are certain rules that we must follow in order for us live together in this rollercoaster ride called society. Let me break it down, and give it to you as straight as possible.

Number One: This is an absolute rule of thumb. There is no gray-area when it comes to
this particular rule. As a matter of fact, you should get this rule tattooed
on your forehead so you never forget it.
*NEVER CALL A BLACK WOMAN A BITCH, UNLESS YOU’RE READY TO FIGHT! As a matter of fact, it can be any woman. You
just don’t do it…period!That goes for men and women.

Have you ever been in a heated situation or even a joking situation where you called a black woman a bitch? Do you remember her reaction, or is there a blank spot in your recollection of that days’ events (cause you got the #$&% slapped out of you)? I’ve seen some of the most soft spoken women go from Snow White to Medusa
in a matter of seconds. It’s almost scary how fast you can turn a woman against you with a simple word. Now, there are words that you can say to some men that might get our blood boiling, but I’ve never seen anything like a woman’s rage after being called a bitch. I don’t condone men hitting women AT ALL, and I don’t encourage cat-fights (I don’t think women fighting is cute), but if you ever want to see a woman (I don’t care is she’s 5’ tall) try to fight a man, or tumble on the ground with another woman, call her a bitch. That’ll be the last time you say it to her face…..unless you’re ready to fight. There ain’t no joking with that word, so use it cautiously.

Number Two: Never go into a woman’s refrigerator unless you’re family. Even family members have to be cautious with this, but let it be a stranger, or new friend and it’s
on! This is just as bad as calling a woman a bitch, but just on a different
level. A refrigerator is sacred. You just don’t go poking around in some-
one’s goodies like that.

That’s the kind of thing that’ll get you cursed-out
in a quick minute. You just don’t do it. Hell, I haven’t lived with my
momma in years, and because of that, she'll give me a beat-down if I’m caught digging
in her fridge (like I'm a visitor or something).

Number Three: I think this is the ONE right here! This is an absolute no-no. You never,
ever, and I do mean NEVER put your feet on any woman’s couch!

If you do it barefoot, or with your socks on, you may be able to get away with it….for a little while, but I pray for you if you put your dirty shoes on her couch. Man, it is on!
Let me ask you….have you ever been chased around the house by a woman swinging a broom at you….I have. Put your dirty shoes on her couch(especially if she doesn’t have any plastic on it), and see what happens.

A woman’s home is not your kick-it-spot, or flop-house. It’s her place for peace and quiet…a clean place to rest her body after a long day’s work. It’s HER place to put HER feet, and cuddle up with a blanket and a nice book, not yours.

Ultimately, it’s all about respect. Some urban women tend to be a little more verbal when it comes to expressing their feelings about certain things, while some suburban women tend to just let it slide. Damn that, if there’s something wrong, something should be said! The same goes for men too, but it just seems like women have much more to say about these things. You see, for the guys, it’s okay to have a “flop-house” when we’re younger. It’s a place for the fellas to come over and watch the game, or stretch out while we’re chillin’ playing Playstation. A big old fluffy couch is "where it’s at" when it comes to kickin’-it, but try that in your girlfriend, or momma’s house and watch that broom come out with the quickness!

Typically, on any given Sunday, I could go on and on about this topic, but that’s all I’m gonna give you ...for now. I'd rather see what your thoughts are on this. So, in the meantime, post a comment, and a suggestion or story, and stay tuned for THE DON’TS OF SOCIAL ETIQUETTE pt.2
…..and with that being said, as always…WHO HAS AN ANSWER FOR THE QUESTION-MAN?

***This article was inspired by Mike Sheezy***


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've always been taught to not talk to women that way, but there have been situations where I was mad enough to call a woman a bitch. Let's just say that I learned my lesson, and I'll never do that again. Nice blog. I like your topics. Keep up the good work.

8:21 AM  
Blogger A.Roberson said...

You know, I never talk to women that way either. I know some women who talk to each other like that, and it's a touchy subject. It's like this. A black man can call another black man the "N-Word" and it's ok, but let another race call a black man or woman the "N-Word" and see what happens. It's the same for the word bitch. They can call each other bitches as friends, but let those same friends use that word out of context, and watch what happens. It's too touch of a word for me to play with, and I suggest you take the same caution.

Thanks for the comment.

8:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG!!! You are so silly. What makes you think of things like this? Actually,it is true though. I don't call women the b-word either.

9:38 AM  
Anonymous Kelly said...

I can't wait to see what pt. is about.

9:41 AM  
Anonymous E. said...

My mom would even let me chill on her couch. It was for special guests only ;-)

9:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What makes the b-word stronger than the f-word? There's something about that word....

9:48 AM  
Anonymous dean said...

Cool blog dude. I like your topics. Looking forward to pt. 2

1:36 PM  
Blogger A.Roberson said...

Thanx for the compliments. They help keep me motivated. Check out some of the Question Man apparel on the right!

Thanks for your support, and stay tuned ;-)

6:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have to agree with you on the whole "bitch" deal. What is it about those five little letters that send women on a conan beserker rage? I mean, I've heard them use it amongst each other. Much like when some brotha's get together and refer to each other with the N bomb. But don't let a brotha get chummy with a chick and let the B word slip. You'd think you tried to kill her and missed.....damien

6:26 PM  
Blogger A.Roberson said...

That't too real cousin! I don't understand it. Seriously, I've seen soft delicate flower type women go nuts when called the b-word. I was going to say it's about how strong a force you use when saying that word, but that's not true. When other girls say it to each other jokingly, and a stranger to the group says it the same way, but without prior approval, she gets the third degree. That word comes with too short a fuse to use, so I'll just skip it.
Thanx for the comment.

7:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL..My mother didn't want nobody except company sitting on her ugly yellow and brown 1970's looking "sofa". We never new why? Like her "sofa" was some type of precious jewel or something. In my opinion it was Sofa-king outdated and old she should have been begging people to sit on it. LOL...
And you better not dare go in the fridge. Was my mom the only mom that said that opening/closing the refrigerator wasted electricity..Please tell me I'm not the only one..

11:56 PM  
Blogger A.Roberson said...

My mom used to think you were going to blow out the motor by going in and out. She also used to say that nothing gonna change in there. If you just went in there 5 minutes ago, the same stuff is still in there, so stay out of my fridge. Couches...what couches. We couldn't sit on the leather. We could sit on the company couches (old and soiled) but never her leather. Here we are 10 years later, and they're still like new...good ol' mom.

12:03 AM  

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